After today I just once again have to ponder my worth as a designer out here in the midwest. I find it so much more difficult then Chicago or NYC not at all because of competition but more the lack of. At least when I lived in those other cities it was a struggle in the fashion competitions that was worthwhile. Here in the OH it feels more and more like a crap shoot. Of all the contests I've entered I feel there is less then half the people who actually design on the same level as me. Perhaps all my work is just too Avant -garde for this town.
I feel like I do the best when I submit things for the Gallery shows then I do for anything else. At least there I don't feel like I need to dumb down anything or worry about the resale is. I do well at the Craft shows but that is a lot of trickle down from what I really love to do design wise. Also my underwear does pretty decently at Undone but once again not my main forte'.
It seriously breaks my heart a little to think that my love of fashion is one-sided with the public here. I'm not alternative, not goth, not trendy, what in the world am I? Somedays I feel like giving up and retreating to nothing more then my "PINK" sweat pant suits and calling it a day for getting dress. I've less and less reasons to bother with my makeup. Lately I'm just happy to cover up blemishes as opposed to how I used to make sure my face was the purest matte porcelain looking mask with impeccable liquid eyeliner cat eyes.
In better news I hope that my new position as the Fashion Editor for the "The Artists Interview" Newspaper will help shape and open up the eyes for this town I call home. There is a lot of good fashion here it just needs to be strained away from the OSU Buckeye Scarlet and Grey. I have high hopes for turning this into an ultimate creative outlet for myself and reinventing some local lives.
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