Friday, December 04, 2009

Pondering Validity

After today I just once again have to ponder my worth as a designer out here in the midwest.  I find it so much more difficult then Chicago or NYC not at all because of competition but more the lack of.  At least when I lived in those other cities it was a struggle in the fashion competitions that was worthwhile.  Here in the OH it feels more and more like a crap shoot.  Of all the contests I've entered I feel there is less then half the people who actually design on the same level as me.  Perhaps all my work is just too Avant -garde for this town.

I feel like I do the best when I submit things for the Gallery shows then I do for anything else.  At least there I don't feel like I need to dumb down anything or worry about the resale is.  I do well at the Craft shows but that is a lot of trickle down from what I really love to do design wise.  Also my underwear does pretty decently at Undone but once again not my main forte'.

It seriously breaks my heart a little to think that my love of fashion is one-sided with the public here.  I'm not alternative, not goth, not trendy, what in the world am I?   Somedays I feel like giving up and retreating to nothing more then my "PINK" sweat pant suits and calling it a day for getting dress.  I've less and less reasons to bother with my makeup.  Lately I'm just happy to cover up blemishes as opposed to how I used to make sure my face was the purest matte porcelain looking mask with impeccable liquid eyeliner cat eyes.

In better news I hope that my new position as the Fashion Editor for the "The Artists Interview" Newspaper will help shape and open up the eyes for this town I call home.  There is a lot of good fashion here it just needs to be strained away from the OSU Buckeye Scarlet and Grey.   I have high hopes for turning this into an ultimate creative outlet for myself and reinventing some local lives.

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